“The love and passion that you cultivate within yourself will fill you up, and light you up. It’s your vitality, your wellspring, your source – your glow. So if you’re waiting for that someone to do any of these things that help affirm your love and worth, it’s time to do these things for yourself. That special someone has always been, and will always be: you.”
The following interview is from the empowering book “Your Sparkle Is Inside of You.”, a book that I created while recreating myself from scratch…
Become your own lover… I know there are women who are critical about the self-love movement, thinking that they’ve seen and heard it all. Some women even believe that it’s merely a time filler for women between relationships.
Well, there are plenty of women around with lovers and spouses, and they are miserable. Formerly being one of those unhappily married women, I can say, regardless of your relationship status, your happiness is your job. No one can take that work from you.
One way to start cultivating happiness is the practice of self-love: a crucial part of self-care. One of my favorite and most fun secrets of self-love becoming my self-glow is becoming my own lover. I imagine how I’d want to be treated by my ideal lover, and how I’d treat him.
By playing both roles of lover and beloved, I found myself practicing a number of activities such as:
·Buying my favorite flowers.
·Buying jewelry.
·Taking candlelit bubble baths with flowers and music.
·Carpeting my floor with rose petals.
·Taking weekend getaways.
·Nights in, watching my favorite films.
·Writing a love letter to me, about me.
·Candlelight dinners with great music.
·Beautiful breakfasts in the morning.
·Snuggling on my sofa with a fireplace going (on my TV, but it’s still romantic). ·Attending an event in a gorgeous dress.
·Dinner out with myself and a steamy romance novel.
·Speaking beautifully sexy things about my body while moisturizing with scented lotions.
·Speaking beautiful words to myself, about myself.
·And (dare I say it? Yes, I dare, we’re grown-ups here) the practice of mind-blowing sex.
Remember, you’re not substituting a lover, you are your own lover, first. Your practice of treating yourself as a cherished priceless gem, sends your body and mind signals that you are loved, you are safe, and you are worthy.
Your acts of love to yourself establishes boundaries, reinforces your values of what you will and will not allow in your life, and cultivates a vibration of love that demands alignment from others.
As you practice, you will notice with time, people treating you with deference and favor, all because you started the trend within yourself. In short, self-love teaches others how to treat you. Many of us treat this as an unaffordable luxury, but I believe this practice is a right of, and necessity for all women. These, and many other little things that you can do for practicing self-love can take as little time and money as you allow, as long as the message is received that you are a priority. The love and passion that you cultivate within yourself will fill you up, and light you up. It’s your vitality, your wellspring, your source – your glow. So if you’re waiting for that someone to do any of these things that help affirm your love and worth, it’s time to do these things for yourself. That special someone has always been, and always will be: you.
– C. L.
